Introverts Homeschool Too. And we even socialize. Sometimes.

We have a simple rule in our house: For every planned day out, we have one day in.  It’s not a hard and fast rule, but it is a fairly important one.  For me.

I’m an introvert, through and through.  I’m not anti-social, nor do I hate being around people.  In fact, I quite enjoy social events.  However, they are physically and mentally draining.  As in, a full day out with friends means a 2 hour nap at home type draining.

And that’s fairly typical of introverts.  We don’t necessarily hate social interaction!  It’s just that when extroverts feel more invigorated, we feel drained.  They gain energy and we lose energy.

So we turn down opportunities and events that don’t suit us in that way.  Although to be fair, I’m the introvert, not my kids.  I think it’s too early to tell their specific proclivities.  But we stay home for my benefit, not theirs.

 

 

And I don’t feel guilty.

I could go on and on here about all the social opportunities they get, and how it all works out.  But that’s not why I don’t feel guilty.  I don’t feel guilty because I have to take care of myself too!

 

Can we admit something real quick?  We are human too.  We have wants and needs and can put ourselves first sometimes.  In fact, we must put ourselves first sometimes.

When you feel relaxed and refreshed, do you feel like a better mom?.  I sure do!  And I cannot be relaxed and refreshed if we go out with other people every single day.

 

Life is about balance.  Do we go our to social events and participate in extracurricular activities?  Yes, we do.

Do I plan our social events on specific days to give myself time to recuperate?  Absolutely.

Have I passed up events because they’re not on the right day?  You betcha.

I’ve also locked myself in my closet and played games on my iPhone until I was ready to face my family.

 

What do you think will have a bigger impact on your kids – teaching them how to take care of themselves or teaching them how to keep up with the Jonses by participating in every activity regardless of interest or desire?

The legacy I want to leave my kids is to be happy.  If you need to stay home and read a book on Friday night, then stay home and read a book.

This is me as an introvert.  Except typically a bit more messy.

I know I’m supposed to feel guilty about this but I refuse.  Not that long ago, I read something about guilt and it struck me.  I wish I remembered where I’d read it right now.

Guilt is such a funny thing.  It’s not really an emotion that comes from within.  Guilt is something we feel because others tell us we should feel that way.

 

I always like to end posts like these with tips.  So here are my 5 tips to homeschooling as an introvert

 

  1.  Know yourself and be yourself.  Are you an introvert who enjoys the occasional social event?  Go out and have fun!  If you really hate social events then avoid them.  If you absolutely have to get the kids out but you don’t want to be social, don’t socialize.  Bring a book.
  2. Know how to recuperate.  Once I realize that I needed time to myself to bounce back, life became so much easier.  Figure out what rejuvenates you and do it.
  3. Love yourself.  Introverts are awesome.  (I would know, I am one).  There is nothing wrong with preferring your own company over others.
  4. Find a level of social interaction you can live with.  I’m honestly still tweaking mine, but for the most part, one activity per day no more than two days in a row.  This helps me balance activities we choose.
  5. Find your people that aren’t socially taxing.  I’ve found there are a select few people that I can be around all the time and it’s okay.  My mom is one, for me.

 

This post is part of the iHomeschool Network Mom Guilt BINGO.  Feeling guilty?  You’re not alone!  See how normal you with the other homeschool bloggers!

 

 

Homeshooling as an introvert can be it's own challenge but it's not the end of the world.

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3 Comments

  1. I can’t thank you enough for this post. It’s like you gave me permission to be myself. I struggle with so much guilt. My kids are EXTREMELY social… I am completely opposite. I needed to read this today.

    1. Ashley, thank you so much for telling me this! Some days I feel really alone as an introvert. But I know there are a lot of us out there (We just don’t talk much, right?).

  2. Dude…. you are my people. Thanks for this. My oldest is nearly 5 and I’ve already determined I’m NOT a co-op mama, and I’m not going to let myself feel guilty. At 5 she is CLEARLY a social butterfly(like her daddy) and at 3!’y son is a mirror of myself. And I’m learning how to serve all of us. So thankful to have read this post BEFORE dtarting our school journey!

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